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« A day of doing everything superwoman style | Main | I don't believe in diets or in negative body image »

Comments

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high.

Hey, I've been enjoying your blog - opens up another world for me. Although I can relate to that awkward Cafe scene. In such instances, I always think that a bunch of handlers should pop out of the woodwork, surround me, throw a satin cape over me that says high.on.markers on it and shepherd me out of the situation, shouting "high.on.markers, everybody!". Exactly like the James Brown handlers on SNL.

Rose

Thanks for writing this. (Of course, I feel like I want to give that response to most of your blog entries.)

I get all spazzed out about whether I'm using my cane or not, and I'm not willing to not bring it, even if I'm just walking to the corner for coffee, and it's *exactly* what you described. If I'm just using it, that's the deal. If I'm trying to not use it, and I "fail," then I feel weak or stupid. And if I don't have it with me and I really want/need it, I feel like crying, and sometimes I have, a little.

Thida

Your entry is reminding of various awkward cafe and other scenes of pain and embarrassment I put myself through for about 35 years. It's literally giving me a headache. So I'm going to give myself a break literally and have been better at doing that in general, but unlearning ableism takes time.

doppjuice

::hugs:: Days like this are allowed, even when we don't want them to be.

I think this is a powerful and scary thought: "you accept yourself how you are, and then you make up your mind you want to change, so you're essentially saying "I want to be this other thing, because I like it better", which is unsettling to identity and certainty."

You are a goddess of self-awareness and a fire-blasting canon of intention. No one can stop you.

fridawrites

Those awkward, in-between moments are difficult--embarassment and worry meet physical reality, and in the ensuing tug-of-war, I get confused and upset. It's really helped me to learn through the blogosphere (your blog included) that a lot of people use mobility equipment part-time and that it's okay to. I'm sorry that the people in the cafe were inconsiderate/unobservant. What helps me sometimes is to plan what I will do next time in the same situation, though the answers aren't easy. Sometimes I find that I wouldn't do anything differently (but recognize that the situation was really difficult) and sometimes I would.

SJ

AW poodle. I am so sorry you had this day.

elizabeth

Now I am going to sound sick and insensative because I really enjoyed this post. It really highlighted HOW MUCH thinking goes on all the time if you have these limitation and how going into a coffee shop takes the planning of a small wedding and how while other people can just focus on thier 'thing' (are you cutting in line or not), you are still having to judge your physical abilities and the pain is wearing your down and making it harder to think and the ramifications of each action are playing out in the head.....

I also understand the desire to know or try or try again to go by yourself and find your limits, and I hope you will try again some other day, maybe in some other way, in some other place with less random variables.

But this captured so much - I hope you put it in a disability carnival or something like that?

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