And speaking of baggage! I pimped that ugly-ass straw "boxy t0te" handbag with the oldsmobile-green trim to the mom-club. And those ladies were creaming their $400 jeans. I got ... oh, 6 or 7 emails from ladies who were desperate for this handbag! WHO would buy such a thing totallly at random? And why?
I tried to keep an open mind, but as I was remarking to the Pilot, while I might easily spent $200 on some sexy go-go boots, I'd then wear those gogo boots for the next 10 years. But handbags, I am just realizing, they change in fashion every year or maybe quicker, and you have to have different ones for different seasons that match your outfit. For fuck's sake! And if you're super class-conscious, you must have a Real Brand one. It's not llike I didn't wake up to the hunger to have actual jordache jeans or god, maybe some gloria vanderbilt ones, when I was 13 or so. (god forbid i end up with "chic" plastered across my teenage ass.) So I can sort of almost understand. BUT THEY're like that their whole lives!! How horrible and alien.
I recall marvelling when i was temping at the women around me, thinking... "You are spending 1/10th of your take-home pay on getting your NAILS DONE, you dumb bitches." just as part of the routine of normal life - not as an interesting special femmy treat.
So anyway I drove up into the hills to drop off the handbag. and a house the size of a small mental institution lay before me, sparkling amid the vinca and redwoods like a genie's palace. who would open the door? Would she be an obvious alien? But no - a nice-looking, femmy woman, probably younger than me, but .. you know, classy and sophisticated and femmy looking. With even slightly hipster-looking glasses. The house had... fancy dark wood china cabinets that were obvious real furniture, and... decorated, sorta... In the distance, maybe 8 rooms away in another wing of the house, I heard a baby begin to cry... Where are this woman's sweat pants and why is she not covered with babyfood? I had to wonder. It is all due to the magic of owning many matching handbags.
You probably delivered her Pod Message and you didn't even know it. Way to go!
Posted by: Jo | May 23, 2005 at 02:19 PM
"Where are this woman's sweat pants and why is she not covered with babyfood? I had to wonder. It is all due to the magic of owning many matching handbags."
Reminding me of Shaw:
"Thus it is easy to prove that the wearing of tall hats and the carrying of umbrellas enlarges the chest, prolongs life, and confers comparative immunity from disease; for the statistics show that the classes which use these articles are bigger, healthier, and live longer than the class which never dreams of possessing these things."
Or, to borrow from someone else, maybe she has a photo in the attic taking care of that baby for her.
Posted by: whump | May 23, 2005 at 10:35 PM