went off to sushi with karen rani, erin kv + appendage, kimberly. oyster shots with quail eggs rule! they were so flirty and obnoxious! and they keep coming up to me and whispering "buffet" referring to the obnoxious things I said about hitting on drunken mommybloggers. "they're the best! just dress butchy, and go in a party and complain loudly that bi-curious married wimminz don't get laid enough and see what happens!" nooo i did not just say that... it was totally a joke, people! they boasted to me of their tit-showing on the internet I think to make the world safe for breastfeeding. clearlyi must go stalk them on flickr esp. because trollbaby is teh hotness.
then had coffee with annalee and i had to do work things for work, suddenly. just like at WisCon it is soothing to go off with annalee. so i showed up late to the speaker/moderator stuff in the city centre basement. where there was no wifi and they keep the wheelchair lift LOCKED just like in the sushi restaurant and the W bar! All of which places I got steely and bitchy and said it is against the law, unlck that thing and let me use it to go to the bathroom without 4 managers coming to do keys and lights and move some boxes... fuckers!
Jory notes that everyone is press here. Lisa adds everyone should expect to be blogged ... can ask for anonymity but might not get it.
lisa talking about the cod of conduct, codslapping. when people sabotage a panel... respect.... whispering too much or giggling... backbenchers. interrupting, dominating, personal attacks. call it out... ask people to not do it... stop and say let's talk more about X, etc. make it go how you want it to go.
I note to myself that in women's groups in general and certainly here we need extra validation and permission and reassurance... for things that a group of guys assume as basic normal things. That need for extra consensus building and reassurance, itself, needs to be explicitly validated. A crucial thing to keep in mind for women and tech and online participation.
i suggested a minor point i learned from watching debbie notkin moderate at potlatch. it works quite well to pick out the next 3 people in audience and point them out and assure them you see them and they will talk next, and that after they all speak you will look again for more participants.
lisa - brutal adherence to the clock. appoint someone your nag.
don't be afraid to interrupt.
I forgot this is being podcasted etc. so it is important to say "hi i'm badgerbag from blahdeblah" before asking a question into the mike.
I mention a bit of practice shutting down hijackers and blowhards and that i am here to hear and speak with other women.... Practice is key.
Elisa sherman mentions again how important it is to introduce yourself before you speak, every time! (I had forgotten again. And so did Elisa.)
more about shutting down.... remember the other people in the room. think of teachers. balance with other people in the room. Everyone in the room can steer the discussion or can shut down a loud person.
squarespace person, "that's an excellent point"
photos with a zillion Lizzes... more photos... bitchy evasions of people asking me why the wheelchair... i am testy about it and refuse to answer most of the time...
contributing editor meeting in which we stood in a circle and held hands... i argued with elise b. who is a food blogger... no i do not think the most important thing for us to htink about is to be supportive of the men here because they might feel unwelcome... ffs... oh noes what about the menz...
cocktail party that was lame
cocktail party that was fancy and fun up on hte 33rd floor at which a drunken mommyblogger who shall remain nameless made out with me a little bit (again! i could not help it... she is a sweet kisser... what happens at blogher (stays at blogher) goes on my flickr...
party and dinner downstairs with a zillion fun bloggers! deb roby, v. from umm i will look up her blog name later and sj and suzanne lynne d. and maria and steph who does blog consulting and lauriewrites and i cannot rmeember everyone's names... and some guy who i did not know... ate duck, goat cheese, frisee , pasta with lemon and tomatoes in it and juniper. hmmm juniper! tasty! Lynne d teasing the fuck out of me for when she asked me about the chair and i went "I was BORN". ha. man, one chick perfectly nice i'm sure met my evasions with "ohhhhh but I'm SO CURIOUS about what it is like to experience life in a wheelchair???" Okay bitch I'll just break your legs then! no prob!
sj and shauna are being very funny in bed. we're staying up too late and talking about everything. i am babbling to them about all my intimate unbloggable details and they return the favor. shauna's book cover is aweseome and gorgeous but she cant let me take a photo of it yet! seecret!